


I'm a Mess but I'm Dying for More

by MonochromaticMatt



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Because KuroYama needs more love, Break Up, Even if I love them as poly too, Getting Together, I fought making this poly, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-07
Updated: 2020-04-07
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:40:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23533192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MonochromaticMatt/pseuds/MonochromaticMatt
Summary: "You should tell Tetsu," Kei clarifies, "that you like him.""Tsukki," he hisses. "I am not saying anything like that to your boyfriend, what is wrong with you?"
Relationships: Kuroo Tetsurou/Yamaguchi Tadashi, Past Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei - Relationship, Tsukishima Kei & Yamaguchi Tadashi
Comments: 5
Kudos: 135





	I'm a Mess but I'm Dying for More

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Beautiful Madness by Neck Deep, because I'm stealing ao3's trend of using lyrics instead of thinking of titles that haven't been used fifty thousand times already.

"You should just tell him."

Tadashi is gazing across the food court, his knee narrowly avoiding tapping against the table in rapid succession.

"Hm?" he asks, attention slowly pulling back to Kei, with whom he now remembers he had been in mid-conversation. 

They'd wandered around the mall's shops for awhile, but now Kei was waiting for Kuroo to pick him up for their date. Kei kept insisting that the three of them could hang out together, and they had a few times, but it was too weird for Tadashi to tag along with the couple. It made him feel unnecessary and a little queasy.

Not that they ever did anything to make him feel that way. They didn't make out in front of him, or make overly obvious gooey eyes, or gush about each other. They never let him fall out of conversations, he was in on all of their jokes, and even Kuroo's flirtatious teasing had extended to him more times than he could count. Tadashi couldn't get comfortable, though. They were a couple, something outside of him, and it felt wrong intruding on what should be their time alone together.

"You should tell Tetsu," Kei clarifies, "that you like him."

Tadashi blanches. "I should what now?" he chokes out.

That may be another reason Tadashi can't get comfortable. Because he likes hanging out with them. Not just Kei, because Kei is his best friend and he's always liked hanging out with him, but Kuroo, too.

He likes Kuroo's teasing nature. He likes how kind he is to Tadashi and how sweet he is to Kei. He likes his terrible sense of humor, and the obnoxious cackle that accompanies it. Tadashi likes being the one to elicit that laugh. He likes his disastrous hair and the way he runs his fingers through it when he's embarrassed. He likes listening to him talk about science and music and _"Guys, we should start a band and all of the songs will be about theories and equations and all sorts of stuff!" "Tetsurou, none of us play any instruments."_ He wants to get to know Kenma and Bokuto, because he wants to know the people that mean the world to this boy. He wants Kuroo, and he's tried very hard to keep Kei from learning this.

"Tsukki," he hisses. "I am not saying anything like that to your boyfriend, what is wrong with you?"

"I'm pretty sure he likes you, too."

Tadashi feels like he's been set on fire. This is the best and worst news he's ever heard. Except it can't even be true. "He's dating you, not me. He likes me because I'm your friend."

"I don't think-"

"Besides, even if I like him - which I'm not saying I do! - what would you have me do? Ask him out while he's still dating you? Try to seduce my best friend's boyfriend?"

Kei's face is still drawn into a scowl from being cut off, but Tadashi knows he'll let that go. Kei can hold a grudge like no other, but never against Tadashi, especially when Tadashi is right. And Tadashi knows he's right.

Kei argues anyway. "That's not a problem if I'm not dating him."

Tadashi pauses. His gut clenches in concern and his chest is tight, but his shoulders fall forward a bit, making him smaller and softer. "Did you break up?" Is that what this is about?

"Not yet."

"Not- what? Are things not good between you?"

Kei doesn't look the slightest bit worried. Not even in his usual facade way, where he looks stoic and unaffected when deep inside he's tearing himself into pieces. Tadashi has known him long enough to see the signs; there are none. "We're fine. You know I'm not in love with him, right? It's been fun enough and," his nose wrinkles along with his pinched expression, like his next words taste unpleasant on his tongue, "and I guess I do even care about his feelings. It's amusing when he thinks he's funny. But I don't really care about the dating."

"Tsukki, it's okay to like him. You're allowed to be happy. And if you're just doing this for me, then you-"

"Stop." He punctuates the command with a light tap of his foot against his shin. "I am happy. Not because I'm dating Tetsu. I don't mind talking to him or hanging out, but I don't care about being his boyfriend. I'm pretty sure that's a thing you're supposed to care about when being someone's boyfriend."

Unsure what to make of that, Tadashi defaults to pouting. Not the intentional one with wide eyes that Kei pretends not to give in to, but the disgruntled pout that Kei collimates to a newborn pup being stepped on by its littermates. Tadashi was about as thrilled by the comparison then as he feels right now.

Before he forms the words to tell Kei that he makes no sense whatsoever, there's an excited voice projecting out from behind him.

"Kei! Yamaguchi! Good to see you!"

Kei just nods once in his direction. "Tetsu."

"Kuroo! Hi! You're here!" Tadashi's voice absolutely does not squeak.

Kuroo chuckles, low and pleasant. "Of course. I can't leave the two of you waiting, someone might just come snatch you up." 

Tadashi tries a smile, but he's sure it doesn't reach his eyes. "I should get going."

"Already?" Kuroo frowns at the same time Kei tells him to wait. 

He falters, not anticipating the look Kuroo gives him, a bit of his initial excitement seemingly sapped with Tadashi's departure. 

"Tetsurou," Kei calls his attention before Tadashi can remember to keep moving. "We should break up."

Kuroo's mouth moves to speak, but closes again when there aren't any words. He sighs, then, looking put out, but not quite heartbroken the way Tadashi would have expected, even as his own heart pounds in his ears and his breathing all but stops.

The three of them hold still for a long moment.

"I expected this was coming," Kuroo admits, just the corner of his lips pulled down, "but I was hoping we'd make it through dinner first. I made reservations."

"We can still hang out," Kei rolls his eyes as if this is common sense. It is, in a way; if the two aren't on bad terms, there's no reason they can't still get together. In the moment, this doesn't feel so clear. "Not tonight, though. You should take Yamaguchi out."

Kuroo's entire face comes together, perplexed. "Why- I mean, I'd _like_ to, but…"

"You like him, don't you?"

"Kei!" Tadashi shouts, much too loud in this very public space, as he finds his voice. 

Kuroo, normally so composed and confident, if not cocky, is flushed red, up his ears and down past the collar of his shirt. 

"Listen," Kei placates as they both stare at him in shock, and a touch of horror. Tadashi is shaking, in fear or rage he's not certain, and he's fairly convinced that Kuroo, limp-jawed, is now broken. "Yamaguchi, you're not very good at hiding your feelings from me. And Tetsu… I don't know if you're even aware you're doing it, but the way you look at him is not at all subtle. I know you both pretty well by now, wouldn't you say? You guys complement each other. Just give it a shot, and thank me at your wedding."

"I'm going to murder you." And he is. Tadashi is going to murder him. 

Kuroo swallows, loud and rough, drawing both of their attention, and looks Kei dead in the eye. "You're serious?"

Kei meets it head on. "Ask him."

Kuroo stares for another long moment, then turns to Tadashi. Tadashi considers fainting; not faking fainting - he's pretty sure he could will himself out of being conscious to this current situation. 

"Yamaguchi. Would you want to get dinner with me tonight, as a date?"

Tadashi is convinced that he did not will himself into fainting, but straight into dying. He's not sure if he's currently in heaven or hell. Maybe he's caught in limbo, experiencing outlandish hallucinations related to his final moments.

"You're kidding." He's succumbed to awed disbelief. 

Kuroo gives a slow shake of his head.

"Tsukki was right? You actually like me? In a dating way?" 

The nervous anticipation growing in his voice must let Kuroo know that he's not frozen in repulsion, but solely from embarrassed terror at the prospect of rejection. Rejection without having even truly confessed.

His eyes relax as a smirk makes its way. Kuroo still has red riding high over his cheeks, but he covers the nerves with his projected aura of self confidence. "Yes, I like you. In a dating way."

The teasing lilt does not escape Tadashi's notice. That's what Tadashi likes about Kuroo: his teasing is never malicious; it's an invitation. 

He swallows the fear, the embarrassment. "Well, then. What are you waiting for? Woo me."

Kuroo's answering grin is wicked.

Kei, having a reputation to uphold, feigns displeasure. "I've made a mistake. The two of you are going to be unbearable."

Underneath his prickly exterior, however, Tadashi could sense his warmth. If Tadashi had any lingering doubts about Kei's genuinity of desiring this outcome, they were dispelled by the mirthful glimmer in his eyes. 

Compassion pushed against his ribcage, filling him up and overwhelming him in the best way. 

"Sorry, Tsukki." He grins even as the words leave his mouth, but he doesn't bother pretending he's anything less than elated. He couldn't ask for a better friend. With Kei at his side and the prospect of Kuroo's hand soon being in his own, Tadashi was looking forward to date nights after all.

**Author's Note:**

> The ending got a little rushed because I was avoiding it, and this still isn't up to par with what my writing used to be, but I feel like it's already an improvement over my last KuroYama drabble thing, so here's to hoping I can just keep pushing until my old writing instincts resurface.


End file.
